Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Lobster Tail Anyone?

Janet and I had been best friends for a long time and met while we were living in the same building.  We met this guy at a mutual girlfriend’s birthday party (who happened to live in the same building as we did) whom we thought was a pretty decent, upstanding kind of guy in our “books”. 
One day he happened to ring my downstairs buzzer instead of Janet’s by accident. “John” asked for Janet and I said it was me and he apologized. I let him in. Now Janet and I lived right across the hall from each other. Instead of ringing HER doorbell, he rang MINE.  I opened the door cordially and asked him what he wanted.  He said, “You know, I ‘m here to go to lunch with Janet but if you want to come, it would be great.” At first I said no, and then Janet opened her door. “Hi! I just heard you guys out here. So John, I’m ready when you are. Let’s go.” He said, “Oh I was just asking Sevda if she wanted to go too.”  I interjected, “No you guys, go already. It’s your date, not mine.”  Janet said, “yeah let’s go.” John said, “No she can’t stay here on such a lovely afternoon. Come with us. It’s alright. I’m inviting.” So Janet and I looked at each other and decided why not? Looks like this guy’s in for a treat.
We go to this expensive Italian neighborhood restaurant he picks out. This guy is all smiles with the waiter as if he’s got a secret when we all sit down for lunch. He has two attractive women with him which he was obviously interested in and it was even more obvious that he was trying to double date us at the same time.  Janet and I caught on and decided to go to the ladies room together to decide what we were going to do with him.
“Janet, this guy called you up for a date, right?”
“Yeah he did and now we’re all on the same date. That’s messed up.”
“And you know what? He’s been calling me just to “chat” but I’m not one to have guys around for a chat, Janet. That’s why I have women friends for but what I really think is that he’s trying you out and then if he doesn’t like you, I’m next. If you like him, take him, Janet. He’s not for me.” I said.
“I don’t like him that much!  I haven’t been out on a date in a long time. I’m here for the lobster!”
I exclaimed, “Oh that’s funny!! Okay we gotta get a plan now. He’s got us here on a double date. So let’s do this. Let’s flirt with him like crazy and then order lobster and anything else that’s expensive. You order the lobster and I’ll order up the desserts and anything else that’s expensive. That’ll teach him not to ask two girls out on the same date and be obvious about it! Let’s go!”
We get back to the table and did exactly as we planned.   He was in heaven until the bill came. Afterwards, we had him drop us off in front of our building. We made sure we left him hanging out there to dry....
And please don’t even feel sorry for this guy. Afterwards he kept on trying to date the two of us at the same time. I know because every time he called either one of us for a date, we’d say no and then call each other! Who man thinks he can call two best friends who live directly across from each other to try to get lucky! What an ego!

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